We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
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I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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