i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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