Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
