Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
