Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Randomize
