Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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