I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
