Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
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Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
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I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
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