Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain