my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
