Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
