I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Randomize
