I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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