She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Randomize
