how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Randomize
