Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

My girlfriend figured out who you are.

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(760): My girlfriend figured out who you are. http://tfl.nu/038w

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(214): View more from Texas

Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.

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(214): Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry. http://tfl.nu/h3dm

Replies (20) Good night (2429) Bad night (925) Order T-Shirt
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(714): View more from California

you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night

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(714): you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night http://tfl.nu/yh1g

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(815): View more from Illinois

He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.

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(815): He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already. http://tfl.nu/j86y

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(313): View more from Michigan

if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it

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(313): if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it http://tfl.nu/hc23

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(916): View more from California

Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?

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(916): Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents? http://tfl.nu/8kv6

Replies (20) Good night (2400) Bad night (1209) Order T-Shirt
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME

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(603): I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME http://tfl.nu/slem

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...

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(605): Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away... http://tfl.nu/4asr

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(618): View more from Illinois

I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.

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(618): I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy. http://tfl.nu/it0x

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.

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(717): My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos. http://tfl.nu/1tew

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(502): View more from Kentucky

He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.

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(502): He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on. http://tfl.nu/ri58

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(417): View more from Missouri

After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing

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(417): After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing http://tfl.nu/he4t

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(434): View more from Virginia

They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.

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(434): They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me. http://tfl.nu/rhi7

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(628): View more from California

Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.

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(628): Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes. http://tfl.nu/sfav

Replies (4) Good night (831) Bad night (178)
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(734): View more from Michigan

Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?

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(734): Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook? http://tfl.nu/02qq

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