He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
