I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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