Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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