Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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