I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
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No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
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You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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