With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...