But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
