i just google imaged poop.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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