My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just forgot I was standing up.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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