did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Randomize