I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize