I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
only if we run a train.
done.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
