That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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