Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
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