just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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