dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize