Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.

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(616): it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina. http://tfl.nu/ij8w

Replies (15) Good night (892) Bad night (4497)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding

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(203): recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding http://tfl.nu/t8fl

Replies (46) Good night (6925) Bad night (856)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE

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(508): I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE http://tfl.nu/54pd

Replies (23) Good night (2186) Bad night (6036)
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(312): View more from Illinois

Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.

(1-312): View more from Illinois

None of that is ok.

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(312): Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there. (1-312): None of that is ok. http://tfl.nu/fi6r

Replies (38) Good night (5702) Bad night (3957)
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(518): View more from New York

You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops

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(518): You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops http://tfl.nu/ldeo

Replies (19) Good night (13030) Bad night (1204)
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(714): View more from California

I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.

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(714): I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later. http://tfl.nu/riev

Replies (17) Good night (2047) Bad night (2450)
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(214): View more from Texas

I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship

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(214): I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship http://tfl.nu/dbjp

Replies (3) Good night (1281) Bad night (648)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.

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(609): Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel. http://tfl.nu/x8kg

Replies (24) Good night (1081) Bad night (514)
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(330): View more from Ohio

I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.

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(330): I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one. http://tfl.nu/be90

Replies (3) Good night (661) Bad night (1470)
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(416): View more from Toronto

Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?

(416): View more from Toronto

I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way

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(416): Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again? (416): I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way http://tfl.nu/h01t

Replies (4) Good night (776) Bad night (1151)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.

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(919): Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties. http://tfl.nu/7t6a

Replies (9) Good night (1676) Bad night (438)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.

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(847): I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message. http://tfl.nu/fe15

Replies (1) Good night (1307) Bad night (496)
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(510): View more from California

I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one

(916): View more from California

Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol

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(510): I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one (916): Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol http://tfl.nu/xjbe

Replies (8) Good night (611) Bad night (1050)
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(47): View more from Norway

Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van

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(47): Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van http://tfl.nu/ihe8

Replies (2) Good night (398) Bad night (312)
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(802): View more from Vermont

The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic

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(802): The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic http://tfl.nu/lc5z

Replies (1) Good night (327) Bad night (329)

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