Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you

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(336): View more from North Carolina

While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(405): View more from Oklahoma

I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days

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(626): View more from California

I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for

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(815): View more from Illinois

High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...

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(509): View more from Washington

I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom

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(607): View more from New York

No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.

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