Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?

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  (215): is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night? http://tfl.nu/ftgg
  Replies (19) Good night (724) Bad night (1597)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests

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  (541): my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests http://tfl.nu/dcsh
  Replies (200) Good night (80981) Bad night (4540)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Even the bartender felt bad for me

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  (585): Even the bartender felt bad for me http://tfl.nu/mj4v
  Replies (5) Good night (596) Bad night (4984)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here

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  (815): Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here http://tfl.nu/3q8i
  Replies (36) Good night (929) Bad night (6138)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.

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  (570): My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend. http://tfl.nu/7sdv
  Replies (58) Good night (6070) Bad night (807)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"

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  (603): i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword" http://tfl.nu/1vn8
  Replies (16) Good night (1295) Bad night (5777)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?

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  (407): Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives? http://tfl.nu/s936
  Replies (22) Good night (3677) Bad night (937)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....

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  (732): say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today.... http://tfl.nu/1sxc
  Replies (3) Good night (797) Bad night (1275)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.

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  (812): Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping. http://tfl.nu/zu80
  Replies (9) Good night (1739) Bad night (509)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry

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  (304): I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry http://tfl.nu/4kpv
  Replies (5) Good night (1342) Bad night (683)
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  (760): View more from California

  The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter

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  (760): The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter http://tfl.nu/uanv
  Replies (6) Good night (939) Bad night (460)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.

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  (608): We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games. http://tfl.nu/omws
  Replies (1) Good night (781) Bad night (270)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?

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  (443): There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut? http://tfl.nu/irwu
  Replies (3) Good night (279) Bad night (597)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Two dicks, one me.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Yoga's definitely paying off.

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  (832): Two dicks, one me. (832): Yoga's definitely paying off. http://tfl.nu/ljaq
  Replies (9) Good night (792) Bad night (249)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality

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  (540): I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality http://tfl.nu/elez
  Replies (5) Good night (788) Bad night (199)

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