hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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