He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
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I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
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I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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