I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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