Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
