She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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