when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
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I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
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Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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