jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize