Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
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