I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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