forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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