The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
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I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
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I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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