can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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