I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
we made out on top of his cat.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
