its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Randomize
