You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
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then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
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how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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