I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
