i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
